“一天开始像任何其他。这是星期五,我was home from work and was gardening in my greenhouse. I got a call from a social worker giving me a general rundown of two little girls needing care. I told her we could do it and went back to gardening not thinking anything of it. I got calls like this often… and only one time before in two years had it actually turned into a child at my door. So, this time I skipped any prep work opting to enjoy my day in the garden instead. Three hours later I got another call, the girls definitely needed a home that night. I rushed through the house cleaning and prepping as much as possible. I called my only mom-friend who immediately offered her SUV with car seats… and off we headed. We drove two hours into the mountains and arrived at the ER late in the evening. We walked in to a room with the two cutest, wildest little girls I had ever seen. They were running their social worker ragged as they touched every button and pulled every cord in the room.
It is standard protocol for foster children to have a full body exam before going into foster care to note all bruises, burns, etc. My oldest had to undergo an X-ray because of previous concerns. It was scary and awful… we had met this little girl for less than an hour when the doctors asked that someone go with her to keep her calm during the X-ray… at that time my husband had created the biggest connection with her so he went along.
At 10 in the evening we were able to pull away from the hospital with two little girls. They spoke less than 10 words between the two of them, but had giggles for days.
到周末结束时，女孩们忽略了我们以我们的名字指称自己的事实，而是选择称呼我们爸爸妈妈。那时，我内心深处知道，我们已经陷入了终生的事物。债券是立即的。女孩们是如此的甜蜜，如此狂野，如此充满爱。最初的几个月是如此幸福……穿着粉红色和珍珠的女孩为女孩们教给她们的颜色和数字。带他们散步和游泳池。我们知道我们的答案是什么，当社会工作者说：‘你们需要决定您是否愿意收养这些女孩。因为，他们需要在愿意收养它们的房屋中。’
My husband and I never planned on adopting. Our plan was to foster teenagers… to be a positive role model and mentor, to help set them up for college. Babies were the furthest thing from our mind. We were in our 30s and comfortable with life. I was driving a brand new sporty car, my husband was driving a purposefully beat-up two seat truck. We were not planning on starting a family! I had had enough babies in my past… nannying and working at childcare centers through high school and college and babysitting my decade-younger brother growing up… I had had my fill of that. My husband and I enjoyed our life and felt no need to start a family… we gardened, golfed, frequented wineries, enjoyed fine dinning…. We were good! There was no logical reason, in our minds, to start a family. But, as soon as those girls locked eyes on mine I knew… I would kill or die for them. As the months wore on I knew I might not be the best mom. But, I am the best mom for my daughters. God had given me all the experiences I needed to know how to parent these special girls. And, although it was life altering to say ‘yes’ to adoption, I knew I couldn’t enjoy a single moment in a day if I said ‘no.’ My heart and mind could never move past wondering if they were okay. So we said yes. Yes, we will adopt these girls.
And the social workers said, ‘great! They also have a baby brother and he will needed to be adopted with them.’ Taking care of the girls was one thing but adding a baby sent our heads under water. We had gone from zero to three kids in a matter of five months. A baby, a 2-year-old and a 4-year-old. The days seemed to go to fast, the nights were long.
当我的丈夫不得不离开州上班时，我们已经有了孩子七个月。我的丈夫是海军陆战队员，我们住在军事住房里，没有他，我将不得不离开基地住房。我在塞拉山脉被流离失所，有三个婴儿独自照顾七个月！我辞职，将婴儿和我本人搬到了加利福尼亚州的猛mm湖，这是他们服务，社会工作者和法院的枢纽。就是这样，我打算在猛mm山滑雪胜地脚下的一个小屋中度过一个冬天。
The time in Mammoth was where I learned exactly how much grit I have, I learned the importance and value of a good neighbor, and how little sleep I could survive on. We had bears in our yard breaking into my car for the Cheerio crumbs in the car seat, we had seven feet of snow in our yard and overnight power outages.
在庞大的我对上帝的信仰是杰姆ented. It was some of the toughest days of my life. And there were so many moments when I knew there absolutely had to be a God, because there was no way I could have gotten through it on my own. My baby woke up 8 times per night on average during those times. Because I was an inexperienced mom, I picked a house with a master on the second floor and the kids’ room on the main floor. My plan was for the baby and I to share the spacious master and the girls to share a room. The reality was that I couldn’t sleep upstairs with the girls down on the main level because I worried for their safety and wanted to be within ear’s reach. So, I spent seven months sleeping on a futon in the laundry room, waking almost hourly to comfort a confused baby boy and calming the cries from frequent night terrors from my daughter. I spent my days learning the ins and outs of IEPs and the special needs education system, in therapy, and social workers offices.
在塞拉斯山脉的七个月中，我丈夫回家了。在社会服务办公室进行了许多辩论之后，我们被允许与我的丈夫一起前往他的新工作站，因为尽管该县距离县六个小时，但仍在加利福尼亚州内。时机是完美的，与亲生父母的拜访结束了，在一周之内，我们正上阳光明媚的南加州。
南加州的时间是育儿，工作和维持婚姻的模糊……几个月来了，并以我们最喜欢的社会工作者的每月访问标记。
We got blessed when it came to our social workers, God had his hand on it. Rose and Sandra were kind and took their time with us. They became a part of our family – we will stay forever connected. For two years we talked to Rose or Sandra daily, and for a year past that, we saw Rose monthly for visits. We blurred the lines of professionalism as we talked family and values, goals and dreams. We shared tears as mile markers were met and our girls grew and developed. I am forever grateful for our relationships with our social workers — they became family, they cared and gave their all for our case.
When it came time, we got to talk about names. Our daughters were 4 and 5 at that time… they knew their first names (and we loved their names). But, we did get the chance to give them middle names. We decided to give our daughter’s names after their social workers and where they came from.
Our oldest daughter is the sweetest, gentlest girl on the planet. She spent her first years caring for her baby sister as a baby herself. She was full of nurturing, tender-hearted care. So, for her we picked Sierra. We wanted to give her the initial of her social worker Sandra, who is strong and spunky. We picked Sierra because it is the mountain she was born on: it is a strong, tough mountain that stands tall and proud… all that we hope for our sweet daughter.
Our middle daughter is tough, she is spunk and spice, drama and attitude. For her we picked the name Rose after our social worker, Rose. Rose is the definition of human service. Her heart is huge. She is kind and soft spoken, she is smart and poised, she is graceful and put together. All the things we could hope for our already strong-willed, wild child.
我们的儿子。我们的儿子知道他的名字叫TJ，所以对他来说，我们决定在高田哈维尔（Takoda Javier）。高田是美国原住民的名字，意为“每个人的朋友”，这正是我对儿子的希望。我希望他成长为坚强，甜美和善良，对任何人和所有人的朋友。
随着姓名和日期设定，我们在法庭上的日子终于会发生。在我丈夫第三次部署的数周之内，我们在猛mm象的法庭上遇到了，周围是家人和朋友的包围。我们已经是一个家庭……但是，法院使其合法是我们所有人都需要的救济和最终安全感。我有3年半的时间计划这一天。我确切知道我想要什么。日期设定后，我将婚纱撕开了。我过夜设计和缝制……最后，我八年前穿的衣服变成了三件衣服。我和我的女儿都穿着。对我来说，首先要让两个人的家庭也需要佩戴才能使我们的家庭成为五口之家，这是有意义的。
On the adoption day I was fighting back tears, like any other mom on the day a child becomes hers. I was scared and elated, full of joy and terror and anxiety. Being a mom is unlike anything else. You wear your entire world outside of you. You give everything for these children and you love them insanely. You realize you are completely vulnerable to utter heart beak if something were to happen to them because, as much as you can try, you cannot control them or the world around them and that is terrifying. Up until this moment I refused to call them ‘mine.’ I referred to them as ‘ours,’ meaning the social workers’, the state of California, the taxpayers. They were society’s babies. That day, they became mine. I was able to use the words ‘mine,’ ‘my daughter,’ ‘my son’ and ‘my babies’ for the first time. That was such an honor and treasure to me. It brings tears and a swelling heart just to type it.
We currently live in southern Texas where we are preparing to open our hearts and home again to the foster care system. Our plan is for babies. We shall see what God’s plan is. Regarding IEPs and Special Needs education… we tried private school, public school and charter school until we decided last year what we wanted is home school. I missed out on so many firsts with my babies, I want them with me every moment I can have them. Until they turn into young adults and I get to watch them make their own families, we will build our memories together each day. My husband is in is 10th year of serving our country in the United States Marine Corps. We thank God every day for our crazy, chaotic, loving and laughing family.”
This story was submitted tobeplay网络一直不畅by Jennifer Maas of Corpus Christi, Texas. Do you have a beautiful adoption story to share? We’d love to hear from you.Submit your story这里并在免费新闻通讯中订阅我们的最佳故事这里。
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